Art Center College Of Design Opens Nap Room To Combat Student Exhaustion

College students are often sleep deprived, yet they rarely receive help from their schools. Art Center College of Design is the exception.



The Pasadena, Calif. college opened its first nap room last year in an effort to combat exhaustion among its students.



The college notes it was important to have the option at least part of the time in an effort to prevent students from falling asleep at the wheel, since it's largely a commuter school.



"Our Nap Room is available for students 4 weeks during each 14-week term. We are a year-round program with 3 terms a year," spokesperson Teri Bond told HuffPost in an email, "The room is available 24 hours on Mondays, Thursdays, Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays during those four weeks each term."



There isn't a permanent location; instead, the room is determined by space that is available each term after all classes have been assigned a room.



Art Center students are hoping to institute a permanent nap room, following in the footsteps of the University of Colorado-Boulder and the University of Michigan, which both have nap spaces on campus. James Madison University tried out "Nap Nooks" this past academic year.



In 2013, Harvard University considered creating a nap room after student Yuqi Hou started a petition that received 191 yes votes. But the Ivy League school is still yet to start one.



Students at other schools, such as the University of Texas-Austin and the University of California-Davis, have designed "nap maps" that reveal the best places to snooze on campus, based upon factors like which buildings have best air temperatures, the hallways that have the comfiest couches and which rooms are quietest.



In addition to nap rooms, Art Center offers "student stress-busting opportunities such as dog therapy, chair massages, yoga, basketball tournaments and free food at lunch to create a supportive, fun and more relaxed environment," according to Bond. "The campus community is deeply committed to helping students succeed and these are just a few examples of how we try to help students be well and thrive."



Full disclosure: we're a bit biased about these efforts.



Earlier this year, The Huffington Post organized an oasis for students at New York University, UCLA and the University of Miami, complete with puppies and massages.



Making student health and wellbeing a priority seems to be a slowly growing trend among colleges, and we admit, we're in favor. If HuffPost were in charge, we’d establish nap rooms on every college campus, just like our own "NapQuest" rooms in our offices.



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Why Washington Fails The Third Metric And What Some Locals Are Doing About It

WASHINGTON -- The nation's capital is not a happy or well place, Arthur Brooks has concluded.



He should know. A pioneer in "happiness studies," Brooks examines the how and why of human wellness in all its dimensions: physical, mental, moral and spiritual.



As president of the American Enterprise Institute, a think tank devoted to extolling the virtues of capitalism, Brooks argues that free markets are the most efficient means yet devised to give people the chance to be fulfilled. While pursuing that intellectual sales mission, he has also become a student of the city in which he lives, and he sees a Washington wellness deficit wherever he looks.



The gist of the story lies in the numbers. Silicon Valley aside, the Washington metropolitan area is the wealthiest in the nation. Though some New Yorkers and Londoners might disagree, the Pentagon's budget and the Federal Reserve's balance sheet prove that it remains the world's most powerful city.



Yet Washington rarely, if ever, makes the top 10 happiest city lists, while it ranks at or near the top of per capita lists such as alcohol consumption and psychiatrists in residence.



In his six years in D.C., Brooks, a best-selling author, said he has seen too many powerful people valuing the wrong things in their own lives.



"Thomas Aquinas said that there are four substitutes for God," Brooks said during an interview in his sunny, spare AEI office suite. "They are money, power, pleasure and honor. Different places are attached to different substitutes.



"Power and honor are the coin of the realm here," he said. "The problem is that what gets rewarded in centers of power doesn't lend itself very well to spiritual enlightenment of individuals.



"People go for the easy, shiny lure," he said. "And there is just a ton of it around here: people you see who are actually pretty smart, pretty excellent, becoming these self-caricatures and these self-aggrandizing mediocrities.



"If you don't have a moral core," Brooks declared, "it's going to be really hard to stay happy."



The former college professor said that he didn't wish to lecture and that "Washington is full of wonderful people." But he still urges people to look for deeper types of human wellness.



Brooks has always wanted to do what he wanted to do -- and on his own terms.



The Seattle-bred son of college professors is himself a onetime college dropout who eventually earned his bachelor's degree by correspondence course. He dropped math for music and moved to Barcelona to play French horn in an orchestra so that he could be with his rocker girlfriend (now wife).



He's a 50-year-old fitness devotee with the lean torso of a Tour de France biker. He wears argyle socks, jeans and an oversized orange-faced wristwatch given to him by a friend.



Brooks attends Catholic Mass daily, speaks of his own spiritual journey easily, and is given to quoting Johann Sebastian Bach, economists Friedrich Hayek and Adam Smith and, of course, Aquinas -- in adjoining sentences in the same paragraph.



Life, Brooks said, needs to be a "self-entrepreneurial venture" to find your own highest and best use. For him, that means "the business of glorifying God and serving others."



Finding your mission is all the more important in Washington, he said, because as a world capital, the stakes are higher here.



"The thing I love about Washington is that it's excellent. Everything is excellent, from the housing stock to the quality of people's minds," he said.



"But that is where human frailty is the most vicious: among people who are the most excellent. That is why virtue is arguably more important here than it is in other places. The Third Metric is more important here than in other places."



With that in mind, Brooks has begun inviting spiritual leaders to speak at AEI, an institution best known for number crunching, free market thinking and military hawkishness.



Last winter the Dalai Lama came; last week it was Sri Sri Ravi Shankar from India. Brooks said that he wants to invite religious leaders of all stripes to speak.



"People know my views, they know my beliefs," he said. "They know that not infrequently I go to Mass in the middle of the day.



"I want people to be able to have that kind of spiritual free expression. And not just religion. Not everybody's into that. I want them to be able to find their path, too," he said.



Openness to spiritual life is just one aspect of a well-lived life. There are others, perhaps more prosaic but no less important to wellness.



For Sen. Amy Klobuchar (D-Minn.), one small step for humankind is her Fitbit. Extolling the virtues of the exercise monitor has become a mission. No one on either side of the aisle is immune.



"I know a senator who wears hers in her bra," said Klobuchar, an upbeat, bubbly sort who chairs the Senate Wellness Caucus. "No, I'm not telling you who it is! But I have convinced quite a few others to at least give the Fitbit a try."



The caucus has only nine members and meets rarely, but it has held hearings on best workplace practices to promote health and well-being (the examples tend to come from Klobuchar's home state), and it has worked to encourage such practices in federal health care laws.



Klobuchar also looks for ways to connect with other lawmakers as individuals, apart from politics. One means of doing so are the "women's dinners" that female senators hold once every other month or so.



"We don't talk about policy or politics," Klobuchar said. "We talk about our kids, our families, our lives.



"Real friendships come out of that, and it makes you feel better about life here."



David McCabe contributed reporting.



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Why We Need to Talk About OITNB's 'Crazy Eyes'

Without a doubt, Suzanne Warren, aka Crazy Eyes, is one of the most powerful characters on Orange Is the New Black. Both in Season 1 and the recently-released Season 2, Warren consistently earns her place as one of the most poignant (and entertaining) inmates at Litchfield.



See, Warren isn't exactly the picture of sanity. Her "crazy eyes," pattern of explosive behavior, borderline stalking of Piper and beatdown of Poussey, among other things, have earned her visits to the psych ward and a distinct reputation around the prison. While many of the inmates exhibit less-than-sane behavior (understandably, it's prison), Warren is a different case. Through a little insight into her childhood, interviews with SIS, and self-harming tendencies, it's clear that her mental health issues are not caused by being imprisoned -- just greatly exacerbated.



Warren is a particularly important addition to the cast of Litchfield characters, because she represents the slew of mentally ill inmates that litter our prison systems. As she is especially vulnerable to violence, manipulation, and fright, so are all too many inmates wasting away among feces-filled showers and itchy bedspreads. In 2006, it was estimated that over half of all those incarcerated struggled with mental health issues -- adding up to over 12.5 million mentally ill inmates, a number still on the rise.



When it comes to mentally ill inmates, the system is broken. This is a term we hear a lot -- "the system is broken." Prison spending, conflict of interests, unsanitary conditions. It can apply to a lot of things, almost all of which are subtly (and brilliantly) addressed over the two released seasons of Netflix's booming success. When it comes to the imprisonment and subsequent treatment of mentally ill prisoners, Orange Is the New Black all too accurately shows how truly broken the system is.



Over the course of two full seasons, we never once see Warren receiving any kind of rehabilitative psychiatric treatment. The glimpses (and stories) we get of "pysch" are not of a place where sick prisoners receive the help they need, but instead a place of even harsher punishment akin to solitary confinement. In the first season, the inmates refer to it as even worse than 'shu,' and the irony that many prisoners descend into insanity after being put in solitary is not lost on the smarter-than-they-look inmates of Litchfield.



These dramatic conditions do largely reflect what we know about the reality of prison psych wards -- conditions that are well examined by NPR's discussion "Mentally Ill Are Often Locked Up In Jails That Can't Help," which glimpses inside the psych wards at Cook County Jail. One of the most startling features of the women's ward, and one most reminiscent of Orange Is the New Black, is the "quiet room" -- a dark isolation space complete with padded walls, a drain, and walls covered in slurs written in blood.



Though mentally ill inmates flail on the inside, Orange Is the New Black argues that the outside doesn't offer much more hope for rehabilitation. When a senile character becomes a prison liability for wandering off grounds, the administration doesn't even bother sending her to psych. Instead, she is granted "compassionate release" -- bound to be homeless and dead on the streets within weeks. Although sources claim this particular scenario is an overly dramatic interpretation of the very-real compassionate release policy, it's not uncommon to see mentally ill prisoners who've served their time released to the streets without any hope of getting the help they need. When it comes to mentally ill inmates, it seems the system is caught in a bit of a catch-22 -- they're not receiving the assistance they need on the inside, but the outside often presents a similarly poor scenario, and tends to lead released inmates right back into the system. With the shutting of most mental health clinics due to budget cuts, inmates like Warren are left with few options and fewer resources.



In terms of Orange Is the New Black, we are reminded that the point of art is to stimulate conversations grounded in truth -- and the truth is we need to be talking about what Warren says about the situation of psychologically unstable prisoners. Instead of helping those like Warren or Christopher Lopez, a mentally-ill inmate who recently died in the presence of prison caretakers, the system forces those already sick into a downward spiral of mental illness. While we can't directly attribute the attention this issue has recently gotten -- such as the recently-established NYC task force focusing on reducing the number of mentally ill inmates -- to Warren or Orange is the New Black, in this case we can appreciate the ways in which fiction gives us the opportunity to reexamine reality.



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Softball Camp Hits Home Run, Pairs Amputee Military Members With Kids Who've Lost Limbs

Integrating Health Care Systems to Save Lives

Benta and Ezekiel Awino have brought their 9-month-old baby, Ronny, to Rongo District Hospital in Western Kenya for an HIV test. Here, Benta, who is living with HIV, has received quality care throughout her pregnancy. Now, both she and her baby return to the same center for follow up appointments to receive services to address the gamut of health concerns common to the region, including malaria, TB, HIV and malnutrition.

This kind of integrated health care model is only now becoming the norm in the district. Up until recently, families like the Awinos, who are living with HIV, went to one facility for HIV care and treatment, another facility for prenatal care, another clinic for their baby's routine health and yet another clinic for any illnesses.

As a result, a child who was not thriving because of underlying HIV and was presented at the sick baby clinic was unlikely to be tested because the facility was not an "HIV" clinic. Keep in mind, the journey to the clinics is almost always arduous, and the likelihood that women return, or come at all, cannot be taken for granted.

Healthy women and healthy babies build healthy communities. We all know this. But we also know that many of the systems in place to keep women and children healthy are fragmented and don't adequately address the needs of those they are built to serve.

These are the glaring inefficiencies/gaps we are considering throughout the forum of the Partnership on Maternal, Newborn and Child Health in Johannesburg at the end of this month.

Simple solutions to align what we are calling "service delivery entry points" within larger systems could make a huge difference to mothers, to the health of children around the world, and, in turn, to a more productive society.

Integrated packages of care save lives by strengthening systems to identify and address potential problems and intervene early. Combining focused interventions for women and their children in the same place, through reproductive, maternal, newborn and child health services as well as infant feeding/nutrition and early childhood services for example, can address critical gaps and create synergies in service delivery. Such interventions include those that relate to HIV, TB, malaria, syphilis, pneumonia, diarrhea and malnutrition.

The Double Dividend is one example of an initiative designed to improve maternal and child survival by aligning reproductive, maternal, newborn and child health services, as well as nutrition and HIV-related services. Infants born to untreated HIV positive mothers, whether HIV infected or not, can have a higher risk of dying than infants who are not exposed to HIV, just as untreated HIV positive pregnant adolescents and women have an increased risk of dying in pregnancy or child birth.

Women when pregnant are much more likely to visit a clinic for ANC, just as infants do for immunization and sick visits. We need to seize these precious opportunities to care for the children and their mothers holistically. There are multiple opportunities to improve linkages between maternal, newborn and child health services to address key diseases and conditions including by:

• linking staff training for various services to integrate service delivery and management;


• 
  


• interconnecting public information about services;


• 
  


• using many different types of services as opportunities to reach families; and


• 
  


• promoting community outreach and support systems.

This not only will save lives like those of Benta and Ronny, it will also save money. The goal is to yield benefits in terms of the health of both mothers and their children through high quality and efficient interconnected systems which promote human rights and accountability.

No matter how you look at it, this way ahead is a win win.

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Putting a Health Care Perspective on Global Competition

A lot of people wonder why a nation that is largely ambivalent toward the sport of soccer much of the time is witnessing sky-high television ratings and packed sports bars for the United States' World Cup games. I think it is, in part, because the U.S. hasn't built the same reputation in soccer that is enjoyed by many of our global counterparts. It's rare for our country to feel the excitement of being the 'little guy' in a sport, striving to knock off soccer's global goliaths.



When it comes to other head-to-head international comparisons, we are unfortunately far from being the little guys... and girls.



If there was a World Cup for obesity and the adverse health conditions associated with it, the United States would be the defending champion and a heavy (no pun intended) favorite to repeat. It's a distressing fact that in a competition in which the prizes are severe health problems and shortened lives, it's U-S-A all the way.



Just take a look at the scoreboard:



• In the sheer number of citizens who can be categorized as obese, the United States has nearly 87 million. Our closest competitor is China. Even with a much larger overall population, however, there are just 62 million obese Chinese.



• In looking at one of the factors that lead to obesity, the United States is the clear leader in the number of fast food restaurants with a whopping 7.52 of these establishments for every 100,000 citizens. When it comes to having an opportunity to ingest huge amounts of calories and fat content in one sitting, no one can touch us.



• We're not unbeaten, though. In body mass index, Kuwait actually holds the world's top spot. Not to worry, though, the United States is number two and striving to move up.



I'm being facetious here, but in reality this is a serious and disturbing subject. We worry a great deal about the high cost of American health care. The aforementioned categories are dominant drivers of those costs. The United States spends more than 80 cents of every health care dollar caring for people with diabetes, heart disease and other chronic conditions that are directly tied to obesity. As we make ourselves the physically biggest people in the world, we're also making ourselves the least healthy and paying a hefty price, in both pocketbook and well-being, for doing so.



And just as the United States soccer organization has built a team that could survive the so-called "Group of Death" and make it into the final stages of the World Cup, so should our nation take the steps to move up from the bottom of the health and wellness standings and become one of the world's healthier societies.



It's very doable and it needs to happen on multiple fronts. Schools need to teach kids at a young age the basic tenets of nutrition and healthy behaviors. Workplaces need to build upon the progress being made with employees on wellness programs and incentives, and public policies should enable and reward those who participate and programs like Medicare must provide coverage for a range of programs including behavior modification and prescription drug coverage to address obesity among seniors.



I'm not going to predict how far the United States is going to go in the World Cup. After all, we're still competing against the long-time giants of the soccer pitch. I do believe, though, in the race to live longer, healthier lives, we can and must take the steps to be far more competitive than we currently are.



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Are We Really More Connected With Social Media?

With the advent of social media such as Facebook and Twitter, on top of traditional news media, are we really more connected?



Tweet: CEO of Starbucks, Howard Schultz's vision to give further to improve corporate-community relations. Finally a leader...



Tweet: Fashion police at the Grammys. Can you believe she wore that? If it is my job to look good, I would too!



Tweet: My cake didn't rise! Too bad, you now can't have your cake and eat it too. Smiley face.



Is all of this really important? Sure, everyone has their definition of what is important and many things can be newsworthy. But does disseminating more information necessarily equate to having real relationships? And can the litany of information available be over-stimulating?



To quote Albert Einstein, "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has exceeded our humanity." Was he right in his prescient observation long before this heyday of techno-craze, particularly social media?



It has been my experience and that of many others, I am certain, that, yes, social media sites can give us both a false sense of connection and cause overload and put increased stress in our psyche and inevitably our bodies. According to Cornell University's Steven Strogatz, these social media sites can make it hard to distinguish between forming meaningful versus casual relationships. This would support the idea that we are becoming a generation of touch-and-go through superficial connections as opposed to authentic and vulnerable inside-out connections. The question then becomes whether e-connections truly stand for e as in 'electronic' or rather e for 'empty'?








As it stands, I have enough stress without having to keep up or rather "read up" about the Joneses through the bombardment of social media. This constant demand would require more energy than ever and can cause stress and fatigue like never before. Hence, can it be that we have reached (or perhaps surpassed) the edge of out-of-control -- or is there a point of return?



Yes, a point of return is always available and it starts with us. What I've found in this noisy world of information overload is that our only recourse to "tuning in" is to "tune out." It's time to get back to simplicity to bring balance to our complex lives. Meditation has been a means to do this by taking me into a state of stillness and silence -- the opposite of what daily modern life showers upon us. Meditation takes me to the bliss within and the peace that pervades me no matter what outer stimulants surround me. During meditation, the feeling is that mental activity becomes more settled. A feeling similar to deep relaxation and calm, but delivering so much more than meets the eye, in which words alone cannot capture. For me, meditation remains one of the most profound, restful, and meaningful connections of all, the one to self.



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Finding Elusive Intimacy (Into Me You See)

"Someday someone is going to look at you with a light in their eyes you've never seen, they'll look at you like you're everything they've been looking for their entire lives. Wait for it." -- Unknown, found on Rawforbeauty.com



I've been taking Stacey Martino's 8-week Relationship Quick Start Program. Stacey taught me that according to Human Needs Psychology, there are 6 fundamental human needs that must be met by your partner for your relationship to truly soar. And while my ex and I struggled to meet any of these 6 needs with each other, the one I had the hardest time accepting was that he wasn't meeting my need for love and connection.



I always dreamed of feeling a deep soul connection with my partner. But I didn't; never really did. Didn't even know it was possible. I thought that kind of love was fiction -- it made for a great romance novel, but didn't happen in real life. And then I started meeting couples who seemed to embody this and it made me sad because I knew in my heart it wasn't possible for me to achieve that kind of love with my ex. There was one particular couple we met while on our last vacation together that really hit it home for me. They were so connected, so in love; we weren't and hadn't been for a long time. That's when I finally admitted to myself that we weren't going to make it.



What I craved in my marriage, what I had been missing for 40 years -- long before my divorce -- was intimacy.



Into Me You See.



And isn't that what we all want? Someone who sees the real us - behind the facade - and still sticks around. Someone who gets us, likes and accepts us despite of - or perhaps because of - our foibles. Someone who is always there when we need a shoulder to cry on. Someone who has our back. Someone who can genuinely say, "I see you, the real you, and I love you."



Into Me You See.



I didn't feel that way with my ex. Didn't feel seen, loved for who I was. But it wasn't my ex's fault. It was mine. I wouldn't let him in, wouldn't let him see the real me. It was too risky, too vulnerable. It was easier to keep my guard up, to try to be the woman he wanted me to be. I wouldn't get hurt that way. Occasionally I tried to let him see the real me, but that never went well. He wasn't used to the real me and so when I tried to be my authentic self, I felt rejected, not seen or heard, not valued. So I hid my true self from him, from my friends and colleagues, from me. I thought it was easier that way - to live someone else's life, be who someone else wanted you to be. I was the ultimate people pleaser, you see.



But what I came to realize this past Spring was that intimacy must start with my relationship with myself. Before friends, before loved ones, before a romantic partner. Because if I don't "see into me," how can I expect someone else to?



And so I started cultivating that intimacy with myself. Starting journaling about what I wanted, who I was, what I loved about myself, my body. And you know what happened? This elusive intimacy found me. In me. In my friends. In my boyfriend. And I feel loved, valued, respected, and truly accepted for who I am. I can speak in my truth. I can be me and not worry about what other people might think. Who cares? If they See me, they'll love me for who I am anyway.



Into Me You See.



So if you too are seeking elusive intimacy, I encourage you to ask yourself: What do I see when I look inside myself? Dive in. You might be surprised at what you find and what happens after you go there.



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Sexual Rejection From Your Partner Damages Your Self-Esteem

Do any of these this sound familiar?



You finally have a romantic night out with your spouse or partner but they drink too much and fall asleep on the bed as soon as you get home.



You're on vacation and away from the stresses of daily life but your partner claims they're still too exhausted to have sex.



Your partner consistently goes to bed either before or after you do.








The bathroom or kitchen might be the most 'dangerous' rooms in the house for sustaining physical injuries but as far as self-esteem goes, the bedroom is far worse. Small sexual rejections are common in relationships as no two people are always going to be in the mood at the exact same time. However, when your partner consistently avoids sex and intimacy, or on the rare occasion when they are willing, are obviously doing so reluctantly -- the accumulations of repeated rejections are likely to have a big impact on your self-esteem.



All rejections hurt because your brain reacts to them in very similar ways that it does to physical pain. But when the person rejecting you is your partner -- the person who knows you best in the world, the person who sees you for who you are, the person who is supposed to love you and make you feel loved -- the damage to your self-esteem, feelings of self-worth, and emotional wellness can be devastating.



Unfortunately, sexual rejections are far more common in long-term relationships than most people realize. At first, people typically deal with such rejections by expressing disappointment, making off-hand comments, or resorting to passive-aggressive behaviors in the hopes of their partner getting the hint. Even when the subject is broached directly, the reluctant partner will typically make excuses or engage in feeble efforts that might not last.



After a while, most people stop bringing it up altogether. The rejection is painful enough as it is, and you probably don't want to subject yourself to further disappointment and even greater rejection. The pattern of avoidance thus becomes a stable aspect of your relationship but your self-esteem continues to erode, your relationship satisfaction continues to drop, and your general sense of happiness and emotional well-being continue to decline.



Is it worth trying to do something about about it?



Yes! By doing so you might actually improve the situation and you can definitely improve your self-esteem. Here are the steps to take:



1. Invite your partner to a 'talk': Make sure you will not be interrupted and that you have their full attention.



2. Tell them how you feel non-judgmentally: They are likely to be defensive so if you want them to hear you, use I statements to present the facts ("We haven't had sex in two years and I feel hurt and rejected."



3. Allow them to respond without interrupting: Your spouse may be unaware of how you feel so allow them to respond. If they make excuses such as "You know how much pressure I'm under at work," or "You know how tired I am after taking care of the kids," you can say, "I do. Have you been aware of how terrible I feel because of this?"



4. Assert your need for change: Assertive behavior is a great way to build self-esteem. Clearly stating you need the situation to change, that it cannot go on, gives your partner as well as yourself, the message that you deserve better and are worthy of more. Doing so is an important step in shedding the insecurity and doubt that have plagued you and rebuilding your self-worth.



5. Insist on a plan for change as well as regular check-ins: Be open to making changes yourself if your partner asks for them and they are reasonable. Ask for one small step you can both take right away to signal your intention to work on this issue. Decide on a regular monthly check-in to make sure things stay on track.



Lastly, some people might fear their partner will simply state there is nothing they can do about the situation even after hearing how it impacts your self-esteem and emotional health. If that is the case, you at least know the reality and can begin thinking about whether the situation is acceptable to you or whether you need to consider alternative decisions. In either case, you can take steps to prevent further damage to your self-esteem and emotional wellness and to begin the process of rebuilding your self-worth.



Photo courtesy of freedigitalphotos.net.



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Do Freely

What are you doing?



The Practice:

Do freely.



Why?



Most people spend most minutes of most days doing one thing after another. I sure do. Typing these words is a kind of doing, as is driving to work, making dinner, brushing one's teeth, or putting the kids to bed. For all the "labor-saving" devices of the past 50 years -- dishwashers, phone machines, word processors, etc. -- most of us are laboring more, not less. For example, in terms of employment, the average work week in America has gotten longer over the past 50 years. Meet someone and ask how he or she is, the answer is likely: "busy." Doing is a huge part of life, yet we don't usually bring much awareness or wisdom to it.



Sometimes doing feels good. There could be a sense of flow in everyday activities, pleasure in your own skillfulness or competence, or fulfillment in helping others.



But often doing feels numb, or worse: on your feet for hours, grinding through repetitive tasks, zipping from one email to another, worried about performance, pressured and driven. In America and elsewhere, the relentless pace of stressful doing gradually wears down mental and physical health, and fuels conflicts with others. It's a big problem, with many costs.



How does your own doing generally feel for you?



Personally, I'm a big-time do-er. Like most of us, I could and should do at least a little less, and spend more time just being rather than doing. But meanwhile, we still have a lot to do, much if not all of it toward wholesome ends, from putting bread on the table and helping with homework to expressing our abilities and helping the world be a better place.



So the crux is not so much the doing itself but our relationship to it. How can we do what we do without getting pressed and stressed, contracted and driven, about it?



How?



For me, the essence of the answer is to do freely -- to feel at ease in the experience of doing, not trapped or bound up in it. Here are some things that have been helping me with this.



Keep returning to the high priority things -- like taking care of your health, making room in your heart for others, or protecting time for the important-but-not-urgent tasks at work -- and let the little ones go. In the old saying: If you're filling a bucket, put the big rocks in first.



Feeling responsible for what you don't have the power to accomplish is doomed plus bad for you and others.



Be mindful of the sense of pressure. It's a clear sign that you're getting caught up in doing. When you notice this, exhale slowly. See if you can keep on doing -- even quickly -- while also feeling more relaxed and at ease.



Do one thing at a time. Bring mindfulness -- sustained moment-to-moment awareness -- into the doing. Develop this steadiness of mind, this continuity of presence, through activities like meditation, making art or music, yoga, or committing to stay focused in everyday activities such as brushing a child's hair.



Feel the completion as you finish each thing you do. For instance, take a second to notice that you have placed a plate in the dishwasher before moving onto the next dish. After arriving at work, let it land that this part of your day is now behind you After talking with a friend, let the experience reverberate in your mind for a breath.



Try to experience doing as living. For me this feels like using a computer or driving a car or talking with someone as simply being an animal -- a friend once called me "a large male mammal" -- moving through its day. The sense of living then moves to the foreground, with doing as a matter-of-fact, no-big-deal, expression of embodied life. It's a subtle shift, but a powerful one.



See if you can regard experiences of doing as "empty": made up of many parts based on many causes that come and go transiently, so that any single experience -- lifting a spoon to your mouth, making a bed, reading a book -- is "empty" of absolute self-existence. Like the suggestion above, this one is also subtle, yet as this felt recognition of the emptiness of experiences of doing grows in you, you'll find that you feel freer in them, and take them less personally.



Last, make the offering (you might like the JOT that focused on this particular practice). All you can do is the best you can do: you can tend to the causes, but the results are out of your hands. For example, all you can do is say what is in your heart as sincerely and skillfully as you can, but what others do with that in their own minds is up to them, not you.



In sum, simple activities such as brushing one's teeth, or more complex ones such as running a meeting or writing a report, are an opportunity right under our noses, many times a day, to come into mindful presence, feel freer, and be at peace.



Rick Hanson, Ph.D., is a neuropsychologist, a Senior Fellow of the Greater Good Science Center at UC Berkeley, and a New York Times best-selling author. His books include Hardwiring Happiness: The New Brain Science of Contentment, Calm, and Confidence (in 14 languages), Buddha's Brain: The Practical Neuroscience of Happiness, Love, and Wisdom (in 25 languages), Just One Thing: Developing a Buddha Brain One Simple Practice at a Time (in 14 languages), and Mother Nurture: A Mother's Guide to Health in Body, Mind, and Intimate Relationships. Founder of the Wellspring Institute for Neuroscience and Contemplative Wisdom, he's been an invited speaker at Oxford, Stanford, and Harvard, and taught in meditation centers worldwide. A summa cum laude graduate of UCLA, his work has been featured on CBS, BBC, NPR, CBC, FoxBusiness, Consumer Reports Health, U.S. News and World Report, and O Magazine, and he has several audio programs with Sounds True. His weekly e-newsletter - Just One Thing - has over 100,000 subscribers and also appears on Huffington Post, Psychology Today, and other major websites.



For more information, please see his full profile at www.RickHanson.net.



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Why Good Things Come to an End

Have you ever had a situation or relationship that seemed so right end up not working out? Maybe it was a career opportunity that seemed like the perfect fit, a friendship that appeared to be an instant BFF, or a romantic relationship where you were sure they were the "one?" And then it ended. And you were not only heartbroken, but shocked because it seemed so right and you don't understand what went wrong?



Why do things that feel so right end?








It's so that you can truly see what is so amazingly "right" about you. I'll explain using the example of a romantic relationship (the same explanation applies to any situation you were sure was "it" which unexpectedly didn't go the way you desired).



What I have seen over and over again with clients is that they meet someone that has all the qualities that they have dreamed about and they are so happy when they are with that person. And then the person goes away -- and often in dramatic, uncontrollable or unchangeable circumstances. It almost feels like the person is literally being pulled away. Well they kind of are -- and for a good reason, even if it doesn't feel like it.



First, no one is the "one" because everyone is the one. Every single person you have a relationship with (and I don't just mean romantically) is a soul mate because they are teaching your soul lessons. We all are mirrors and teachers for each other to learn our life curriculum. Next, just as people are here to teach us where we have judgments and unresolved issues, they are also here to illuminate what is so amazing about ourselves that we are not acknowledging, owning and experiencing.



If you have been with someone you thought was the one, you probably found certain qualities about him or her incredibly attractive. You also may have said, "He brought out the best in me!" Exactly. He or she did bring out the best of you, but it's YOUR job to keep it going. They fulfilled their spiritual agreement with you by attracting you with their awesome qualities to reflect to you what you are not seeing about yourself. And by triggering the best inside of you so you could have the experience of your awesomeness. But it wasn't their job to stay.



For example, if you were really attracted to their confidence and drive, one of their gifts to you was to inspire you to reconnect with your confidence and drive. We cannot see in another what we don't have inside ourselves. If you feel like the person brought out a quality of yours like creativity, you are incorrect. They merely triggered what has been dormant inside of you. No one else can make us anything that we aren't already.



If the person was still there, you would not be motivated to be the things you miss about them. If the person had stayed, you would have always attributed the best you that you felt around to them instead of you (which can lead to codependence).



I understand that nothing feels quite as devastating as not being able to be with the one you thought was the "one" or have the thing you thought was "it." But this is just short-term devastation. What would be devastating long-term is never truly integrating the amazing qualities you saw or experienced.



Trust that even though the physical presence of a someone or something may not be there, the qualities you loved belong to YOU. You can never lose them.



You bring out the best in you. It's there. Stop looking for it in the eyes or arms of another or some external situation. And when you bring out the best in you -- then you will attract what is truly best for you.



Love,



Christine



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Nasty Neural Habits: Take 2 Positive Thoughts and Call Me in the Morning

Two discoveries are changing our world in a good way: one, much of what we think is wrong in the world gets its start in and is a product of our brain. Two, there is a lot we can do to change the brain without a single operation or drug. Many of the ways that you can make yourself better and the world better at the same time is by by getting to know yourself and getting over yourself. It is a life's journey toward worthy service in the world, but really it is your brain's journey toward renewal.



Human beings are amazingly resilient, and that resilience is part of our core beings. We are wired to survive so many bad and dangerous situations. We are a remarkable piece of engineering that is truly miraculous. But accidents that occur to us over time, what I call "nasty neural habits," creep into our standard operating system. One day you are moving along fine as a child, and a parent yells at you or embarrasses you at the wrong place and the wrong time, and poof, you have a hard wire in your brain that associates humiliation with something basically good, your image in the mirror, your sexuality, your speech, or your performance in school.



The parent or teacher might have been having a bad day, absorbed in their own inner wars, and never would have wanted to hard wire you for failure or pain for the rest of your life. But suddenly a pathway of neurons and chemical reactions gets triggered in your brain due to humiliation so that every time you try to eat normally, or study, or make love, or smile, or look in the mirror, something very nasty happens to your insides. You may have been doing just fine as a baby, and -- poof -- you get a wound that the doctors cannot fix and every time they touch the wound they make your scream in pain, until eventually you heal. But by then there is a nasty neural habit associated with touching, and you cannot understand why you do not like to be touched, which could haunt you for the rest of your life.



In my own life, I was brought up in an environment that was overshadowed by the childhood death of my uncle due to an accident. He died at 4 in a lumber yard, the only son, and my mother's only sibling. Her parents divorced after that, and my grandmother cried for the next 40 years, perhaps suffering from untreated shock and depression. I was told the story of the death over and over again, and it was never admitted that I was named after him, due to superstition and trauma. It is hard-wired in me, that sense of being a precious, unique and completely endangered child. It did not help that I was born with asthma and had frequent colds, but that need not have been so traumatic.



The wiring of thought patterns here was designed for fear, trauma, insecurity, and fear of loss. I managed to overcome many hard wired fears, traveling to places of conflict that others considered too dangerous, from Palestine to Syria and Jordan, to Afghanistan. But it was only recently that I came upon an interesting spiritual approach that emphasizes the indestructibility of your highest self, or what Westerners call the soul, that there is no danger to it, no way of harming it. An interesting rewiring of thoughts on danger that have made it easier to for me to manage danger and insecurity in life's many unknowns.



What has emerged in both science and wisdom traditions is that positive thoughts have consequences for hard wiring, especially when they are repeated often, daily. We can re-order even the most damaged parts of our thinking and feeling, when we decide to do so.



I have worked and taught in zones of violent conflict for over 30 years, with students from Syria and Iran to Afghanistan, Israel and Palestine. There is so much bad, so much damage, in the real world, the world outside the brain. And yet we have learned that the greatest damage is brain damage, not from accidents, but from: horrible thinking about neighbors, assuming the worst about others who you do not know, stereotypes, conspiracy theories, false information, absurd indoctrination passing for education, fatalistic and defeatist thinking about your own culture and society. The first step in healing the destruction in our world is healing the destruction in our own thoughts. Moving on from that to positive thinking we have discovered an infinite world of possibility that creates real change in human relations that emerges from inside the resilient human brain.



Dr. Marc Gopin, James Laue Chair at George Mason University and Director of the Center for World Religions, Diplomacy, and Conflict Resolution, sits on the Foreign Policy and Religion Working Group of the United States Department of State.



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The New Generation of Healthy

I was 12 years old in ballet class when my teacher walked over, pushed her hand into to my stomach and said, "You must be eating too much of your parent's food." My parents owned a deli. Thirty years later those words still echo in my mind. Puberty sent me transitioning into junior's clothing. I remember trying on a size 3, then size 5, and finally having to settle with a size 7 that required three inches of hemming. I wasn't a fat girl; the term was chunky.



Another image buried in memories includes returning from a family vacation with the grandparents where we ate out every day consuming grilled cheese sandwiches and our afternoon ice cream treat. My mom commented on how much weight I gained. I knew I had a "problem."



By 14 years I was already putting myself on diets and restricting my food intake as I saw my mother do year after year. I was supported and encouraged in my efforts.



Throughout my 30s and 40s I read tons of diet and nutrition books and increased my protein, decreased my carbs, loaded up on water, exercised more, did more strength training, experimented with weight loss supplements... and the list goes on.



In 30 years never I read about health. Emphasis was always placed on losing weight, toning a certain part of my body, or hitting that magical number on the scale. One book in particular though started my thought process in a new direction: Intuitive Eating . It focused on why I was eating, listening to my body, and rejecting the diet mentality.



As I mom of a young daughter I hope to impart a new way of thinking that will instill a lifetime of healthy habits. In our family the word diet does not exist, nor does weight loss, or even fat. We don't own a scale or talk about our clothing size. We talk about everything in terms of health and what is best for our bodies -- physically and mentally. The goal is to re-frame the way we look at food. By incorporating a few techniques you can start your children on the path to a new generation of healthy.



Teach food is fuel. As early as 3 years old I explained to my daughter that our body needs different types of foods which are like fuel for our body. Some foods provide protein for muscles, others give us minerals for strong bones, and some bring us energy. Let children know that there are healthy choices that fuel our body and other choices that do not. When we give our body the right fuels it can keep us healthy. This shifts the emphasis from an external picture of health to the real purpose of food.



Satisfied vs. full. I never used the word full until recently. I always asked, "Are you satisfied?" Satisfied is a much different feeling than being full. Most of us are conditioned to eat until we are full, which is often too much. Asking if you are full sends the message that you should eat beyond capacity. At 5, I can now ask my daughter if she is satisfied or full. She understands what it means to reach the level of satisfaction vs. being full. Now she turns down food because, "I am satisfied and don't want to get full."



Listen to your body. Children are intuitive. They instinctively know when to stop eating. It's usually us adults that are pushing more onto them: "Do you want another helping? Would you like more?" If we instead stop and ask, "What is your body telling you?" they will often respond honestly. "What does your body want to eat right now?" Yes, I know your thinking your children will say, "a cookie!" But, they might surprise you. If given time and practice to listen to what they really want a child will make healthy choices.



Moderation. I know we hear it all the time. Knowing it is one thing, applying it another. Moderation is a great way to replace "good" and "bad" foods. We use traffic light eating and categorize our food by green, yellow and red lights. Green means go, eat as much as you want. Yellow signifies to slow down, eat daily, but in small amounts. Red means stop and think. We can enjoy these treats occasionally, but in smaller portions. We can't avoid every birthday party or control what happens outside our house, but if we let our children know that special foods can be enjoyed sparingly it no longer becomes this looming evil we constantly confront.



Our babies will be bombarded with images of those skinny, airbrushed models who endorse the low-fat processed invention of the month. If we can begin early to teach them the true meaning of healthy, maybe their struggle will be a little easier than ours. This all might change when my daughter turns 12, I'll let you know. But for now I will embrace her healthy 5-year-old body and continue to empower her with knowledge of what it really means to be healthy



Dawn Wynne is a best-selling children's author, award-winning teacher, and certified health coach. Combing her love for the environment, passion for nutrition, and teaching talents she works with children and families to help them make healthy lifestyle choices. For information on her books visit her at www.dawnwynne.com.



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Why You Might Not Be Free

Anticipating a July 4 filled with barbecues and fireworks, I find myself pondering the real meaning of freedom. How some are free and others are not. How there are people even in this free country with no freedom at all. Freedom is not one thing. It is an ideal that manifests in many forms. Like everything else in our world, it has three components: the physical, the mental/emotional, and the spiritual.



The physical aspect of freedom involves, among other things, our surroundings. Where we live matters. For some, freedom features wide open spaces, abundant nature, lots of elbow room -- a farm, perhaps. For others, that version of freedom is a prison of isolation and back-breaking work. For city people, freedom is the ability to press an elevator button and stroll outside into the melee, the diverse culture of theater, restaurants and music. In an ideal world, we would all have the freedom to live where we choose. But what if, through marriage, economics, old age, illness, or even war we find ourselves in circumstances that oppose our fundamental picture of freedom? Can we survive? Can we thrive?



That's where the mental/emotional component kicks in. We've all heard the adage, bloom where you're planted. Not always easy. My personal story is a case in point. When I met my husband, he lived on a horse farm in Virginia; I, in a Chicago townhouse. After years of back and forth, my husband's dream prevailed. We moved to the farm. The reason he prevailed is that I was more flexible and adaptable. Why? Because my idea of freedom was more mental than physical.



Even so, it wasn't easy to go from the rich social culture of Chicago to the silence and isolation of a Virginia farm. It took me two years to grow roots in that soil. I had to get used to the rural culture, which at the time contained biases I didn't share. I had to forgive, banish judgment, and seek the profound goodness that I knew was in there somewhere. In time, I grew to love them and their ethic of hard work. Seven years later when we moved to the Northeast, I was extremely sad to leave. Even now, twenty years later, I still dream of the undulating 35-mile view of pasture, horses, and four-board fencing from our bedroom window. It was an honor to have lived there.



I viewed my return to the Northeast, however, as another opportunity. I adapted more quickly this time because I was near my family, the boys were in school (easier to meet people), and in spite of the population and traffic density, there was an explosion of culture I was apparently starved for. I jumped right in.



Not everyone can adapt that quickly, I know, because I see it all around me. I see it in people who, in spite of the opportunity, never considered leaving the area of their origin. Sometimes staying close to home is a clear choice, but sometimes it's a product of fear. Fear of stepping out of the comfort zone. Even in a philosophically free world, fear can handcuff any of us in a moment. Just ask the ill and the elderly, the physically and mentally impaired, or those who are frustrated by lack of finance or opportunity. Frustration is hard to put aside; it can kill motivation and forward movement. Frustration is just one of many mile-high mental/emotional fences that can keep us from our intended lives.



As a young prisoner, Dr. Viktor Frankl (1905-1997) did a phenomenal job of investigating the ultimate frustration and devastation of physical and mental confinement in WWII concentration camps. The extreme examples of survival (or not), of flexibility and adaptability (or despair) that he describes, provide the key to human motivation. Why did some persist and others desist? Frankl didn't see it as luck so much as an element of personality and world view. For some, life was worth living under any circumstance, and for others, it simply was not. (Read: Man's Search for Meaning, a life-changing book.)



Frankl would probably agree with Thomas Merton (1915-1968), a (mostly) cloistered monk, that the answer to the question of true survival is based on the third type of freedom -- the spiritual (by which I do not mean religious). Merton led a licentious, intellectual and cosmopolitan life prior to his calling. By all accounts, he should have panicked and reversed directions when he arrived at the cloistered cell of the monastery in Kentucky. His new life was an imprisonment of isolation, labor, and enforced silence. In a cell! Instead, he called it "these four walls of my new freedom..." For Merton, incarceration wasn't the cloistered life he'd chosen, but the one he'd led accidentally -- the one bound by destructive habits and personal attachments. In his confinement he was able to free himself and the planet through a constant stream of contemplative prayer and sacrifice. He was free to remove himself from all that was temporal, temporary and false, and replace it with all that was eternal and true.



I read an article in the paper many years ago in which the author decided to try meditation in a 'why not?' mood. After a week he said he couldn't believe he'd waited so long. Within his quiet seeking he was unexpectedly "ambushed by love." (Though I've long forgotten the author's name, I have never forgotten that description.) Meditation and contemplative prayer are the spiritual means for people of any religion or culture to directly experience true freedom from confinement or hardship. It contains no words, no ideas, no concepts or belief systems, no barriers to truth. Through these higher forms of prayer, we are confronted with the infinite bodiless, mindless freedom of our common Source. It has to be experienced to be believed.



In the end, the only true freedom is the spiritual form, because once attained, it can never be taken away without our consent. Physical and mental freedoms are conditional, but spiritual freedom is not. It is the great equalizer, endowed on anyone with the awareness to ask. This July 4, I wish you all the freedoms you seek and the ability to ask for the ones you don't have.



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Man Who Has Cerebral Palsy, Multiple Sclerosis Says Medical Marijuana Changed His Life

Seth Green, whose multiple debilitating conditions prevented him from living a "normal" life, finally found a solution.



The 23-year-old says in the video above that medical cannabis has helped mitigate the panic attacks, depression and anxiety he experiences due to cerebral palsy, a congenital disorder that affects his muscle and cognitive functioning. Medicinal marijuana has also helped him cope with multiple sclerosis, an autoimmune disease that affects the central nervous system. Green, who is both a patient and an activist, also suffers from scoliosis and seizures.



"I want to be a normal man in society -- or close to it," Green, who lives in Tennessee, says in the video. "I don't want to draw an SSI check each month and live broke. I want to get out and be productive and either help people or, if that is not my choosing, work for a living. I don't want to just sit home."



Green has become an advocate for medicinal marijuana, sharing the story of his struggles through the nonprofit Healthy Hopes, which helps patients legally obtain medical cannabis. Green's ailments are listed as qualifying medical conditions in most states' medical marijuana regulations.



The outspoken activist has held a rally to support Tennessee's 2014 Herbal Bill, which attracted more than 300 people. He also testified at the state Capitol in Nashville on the same bill in front of the House Health Committee. And he says he doesn't plan to stop there.



In an email to The Huffington Post, Green said that after he moves to a state such as California, where medical marijuana is legal, he plans to run for a state representative position. Ultimately, he said he hopes to curb government regulation and special interest groups that back major pharmaceutical companies, which he believes offer poor long-term solutions such as pain pills.



Recent research from the American Academy of Neurology indicates that medical marijuana does ease muscle spasms and pain in patients who have multiple sclerosis. The National Multiple Sclerosis Society supports legal use of medical marijuana, but says that more research is needed on the benefits and side effects.



The legalization of medical marijuana does not draw support everywhere. Some opposed to usage worry about the effect it will have as a gateway drug, the risk of people driving under the influence and a lack of thorough scientific research on cannabis as medicine, the New York Times pointed out.



Medical marijuana use is currently legal in 22 states and the District of Columbia.



For Green, the proof of medical marijuana's effectiveness is clear day by day, he says. As an activist who wants others to feel relief from their medical conditions just as he has, he wants to make one thing clear:



"I'm not a drug user -- I want to be a normal man in society."





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Optimizing Your Workouts, or the Sweat Doesn't Mean a Thing if Your Workout Ain't Got That Zing

I've spent the better part of a quarter of a century (more than half my life) dedicated to health, fitness and wellness. In that time, the most frequently asked question would have to be: Why isn't my workout plan working? There isn't just one simple answer. There are several things that help determine whether your training regimen will succeed or fail. The following suggestions are those that I have shared with clients, followers, friends and family alike to great success:



• Workouts often start and fail in the planning (or lack thereof) stage. Therefore, before you hit the Lululemon store and get the latest and greatest cross-training shoes, ask yourself the "what, why and for whom" do you want to accomplish this for. Simply put, for a wellness (diet and exercise) program to be successful, one needs a specific goal (lose weight, tone up, etc.) and a clear course of action (the right program) to fit their lifestyle and budget. Last, but not least, MAKE SURE YOU ARE DOING THIS FOR YOURSELF, and not someone else (be that your husband, wife, boyfriend, girlfriend). Doing it for someone else will leave you feeling resentful and unfulfilled and ultimately sabotage and undermine the possibility of realizing your wellness goals. So, once you've satisfactorily answered the "what, why and for whom," you need to set a realistic goal and timeline to accomplish that goal.



• One of my biggest gym pet peeves is watching someone execute an exercise improperly or, worst yet, watching someone performing an exercise that isn't appropriate for their body type and/or objectives. It takes every bit of self-restraint not to walk up to someone doing a squat or a lunge with their knees extended far past their toes and say WHAT ARE YOU DOING? You're going to destroy your knees and your back AND not getting any of the benefits of the exercise. Additionally, if you were looking to reduce size in your butt and thighs, I would caution you to avoid doing traditional weighted squats, as this can add size to your thighs and butt and not reduce them. I've seen the simplest exercises executed really badly (from push up to lat pull down, to name a few). No two people are exactly alike. Therefore, what may work for me in the gym won't necessarily work for you. EXERCISE IS NOT ONE SIZE FITS ALL! What doesn't change is correct form! I am and always have been a stickler for correct form. Do it right and you feel and see the difference!



• STAY IN THE MOMENT -- In my book Sound Mind Sound Body, I advised you to take time out of your day to "honor" yourself. This was the time of day that you would dedicate to your wellness. Gone is the day when I have two hours to spend exercising in the gym. I've realized that this isn't necessarily a bad thing, as my workouts have become very focused, cardio-sculpting circuit workouts. Whether you spend two hours in the gym or try one of my 10-minute express workouts, make every moment count. When you leave the office, try to leave the office behind. Leave your cell phone in your locker. There is a reason that many health clubs forbid the use of cell phones on the workout floor. Now, full disclosure -- I take my phone onto the workout floor. As a single father, I need to be connected at all times of the day. However (save the crazy emergency) I try to avoid looking at it. As I am always "running against the clock," my workout time is very precious to me. Workout time is not the time to socialize, catch up on your soap operas or Google Chat with your friends.



• PUT YOUR BRAIN IN YOUR BUTT! -- I coined this phrase several years ago to make people think about "engaging their brain" while they worked out and connecting it to that part of your body that you are training. For example, if you are doing squats and lunges, your focus should be in your legs, anchoring in your heels to emphasize the blast in your butt. Mindful training will help insure against injury and accelerate your desired results.



I just finished reading an SOS email from a good client of mine. "HELP! I have all this equipment and I don't know what to do with it. I want to get started but don't want to injure myself." She did everything right to prepare herself for a healthy, fit summer. She trained hard at my club and (mostly) followed my nutrition recommendations. She even went and followed the suggestions I made for purchasing exercise equipment for her house at the beach. It takes me back to junior high school algebra -- not one of my favorite courses. I'd spend hours being tutored by my Uncle Joel, who lived down the block. I'd swear I understood it all as I bolted out the door. By the time I got home (two minutes later), I had already forgotten all that I had been taught. Many years later, I understand that what was missing was the "mind connection." I definitely left my uncle's house thinking I understood what he was explaining to me. Clearly, my wires weren't connected and fully engaged. My client has all of the necessary tools -- knowledge, equipment and desire. The trick is utilizing the lessons I taught her, finding the motivation, and last but not least, connecting mind and body. Too often I see people "walking through" their workouts, which can lead to injury, unrealized goals, and ultimately complete dissatisfaction with one's training routine. To make the most out of your workouts, stay focused, engage your brain and visualize the body you were meant to have. WANT IT, WILL IT, MAKE IT HAPPEN!



• Physiological -- The most perfect workout plan will fail if you don't:

• Get enough sleep -- failure to get adequate sleep will among other things leave you feeling depleted mentally and physically and sabotages your hard earned workout gains. It can elevate your cortisol levels, which can lead to weight gain. Lastly, poor eating habits and sleeps deprivation usually go hand in hand. When people are tired, they often make bad food choices (e.g., comfort food).


• 
  
  
  


• Adequate fuel -- I like to say EAT TO LIVE -- starving your body will only serve to upend your fitness/wellness transformation. You need a balanced diet -- making sure to fuel up on fruits, vegetables, grains, lean sources of protein, legumes, nuts and seeds. Small, abundant healthful meals throughout the day will keep you optimally fueled and keep your brain, organs and body working efficiently.

In closing, everyone should strive to be the best that they can be. This is attainable if you follow the above guidelines. Sound Mind Sound Body is just around the corner.



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5 Reasons We Keep Doing Something That Results in Failure

I'm referring to dieting. Any diet. Despite the fact that the vast majority of dieters are doomed to regain not only the pounds they've shed, but to pack on a few more for good measure, we continue to try and try again. At any given time, 108 million Americans are depriving themselves. The typical calorie counter goes on a diet four to five times every year, supporting a $61 billion a year weight loss industry.



We go gluten-free. We imitate cavemen. We subsist on a few cookies per day. We buy The Magic Bullet so we can eat baby food. And the weight loss schemes just keep on coming, much like the wind-whipped California wildfires in the third year of a drought.



You don't have to be Albert Einstein to realize that "Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results" exemplifies insanity. I coach many long-time yo-yo dieters in my work as a Wellness Coach and have been trying to figure out why so many of us are serial dieters. How do we convince ourselves that the 17th diet will succeed even though the first 16 did not? Here's my take on why diets are so seductive:



1. We Experience Instant Gratification: Dieters lose weight fast and make us feel successful. Calorie deprivation will do that for you. The pounds melt off and suddenly stepping on your bathroom scale becomes less traumatic.



2. We Gain the Illusion of Control: Diets take real life temptations out of the equation and make us believe that we are now in control of our eating habits, even if that means eating tasteless packaged food with unpronounceable ingredients or hold-your-nose blended kale drinks.



3. We Get to Punish Ourselves: We know we've been bad and depriving ourselves feels good because we deserve it. Dieters are punished for their transgressions, much like Catholics going to confession and saying penance. That's why the colon cleanse is so popular.



4. There's Always a New Flavor of the Month: Strange new diets emerge every year. That's why diet books are perennial best sellers. Just when we think we've tried everything, some enterprising diet guru comes up with another brilliant idea. We convince ourselves that this one is The Holy Grail and we go for it.



5. We Believe It's Our Fault that We Failed: We blame our past weight loss failures not on the diets, but on ourselves. If only we had stuck to the program we wouldn't have weakened and succumbed to pints of Haagen-Dazs and large bags of Doritos. If we had just had more willpower, we wouldn't be back in your "fat clothes" now.



It's time to realize that no diet is ever going to work in the long run. At some point you'll tire of being crabby and perpetually hungry and return to the very habits that got you in trouble in the first place. The only answer is to learn how to slowly change those habits so that you can live in the real world with its overabundance of tempting, inexpensive, highly caloric food. Habit change is a slow process, but the only way to lose weight and maintain a healthy weight for the rest of your life.



So get real. Get healthy.



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Top 7 Most Addictive Unhealthy Foods

By Caroline Young

Whether it's on a giant billboard, in a cheesy commercial, or filling a glossy page of a magazine, unhealthy temptation surrounds us every day.

Typically, frequently-advertised foods are the very ones we crave: foods high in ingredients like sugar, fat, and salt. Specifically, fast food restaurants' advertisements and menus send environmental cues, which can trigger addictive overeating. Highly-processed fast food can become a craving, which is seen in statistics of obesity.

But just what makes certain ingredients so addicting? Why does it feel like we need more and more of them, the more we eat them?

1) Processed Baked Goods

Eating just one Oreo seems like it is just not an option. But why? Studies show an ingredient in many baked goods, High-Fructose Corn Syrup, can actually cause reactions similar to those made by drug abuse. When a sweet craving hits, opt for a more nutrient-dense snack like berries or another fruit with some cinnamon on top of oatmeal. And you may want to think twice about adding artificial sweeteners to your cup of coffee, because chances are, it may lead to greater sugar cravings later.

2) Soda With Caffeine

Soda's combination of sugar or high-fructose corn syrup, with caffeine, is the perfect addictive recipe. The caffeine goes directly into your bloodstream and blocks adenosine receptors, stimulating the adrenal gland to produce the flight or fight chemical adrenaline, which gives people a feeling of energy. In so many words, the body is being forced into an unnatural state that often leaves it exhausted later. And it's easy to forget when you're drinking a coke that you're drinking tons of calories and sugar too. Only one can of Coke has 11 teaspoons of sugar. Acidic soda can also eat up and erode teeth enamel. If gaining weight and decaying teeth isn't enough reason to avoid soda, the over consumption of soda can cause psychological effects. Studies show drinking too much of a caffeinated soft drink has actually caused or amplified a patient's mental disorder symptoms.

3) White Bread

Do you wonder why it's hard to steer clear of the breadbasket when you're out at dinner? When it comes down to it, any processed and high-glycemic carbohydrates, like white breads, are hard to stop eating and make us crave more. One study shows people who consume more nutrient dense, low-glycemic carbs are less likely to overeat. Examples of lower-glycemic foods are most fruit, beans, and whole grains, which release glucose more slowly into the bloodstream, and helps to balance blood sugar and fat storage.

4) Potato Chips

Potato chips are high in salt and fat. When we bite into a greasy, fatty potato chip, our nerve endings send signals, which travel up to the pleasure center -- the hypothalamus -- of our brains. We eventually overload the pleasure center, and crash. Then, we want more, more, more. Even the "healthier" chips, like baked veggie chips, are usually high in fat. Instead, snacking on foods like baked kale "chips" is a better option when you have a hankering for a salty and crunchy snack.

5) Highly-Processed Meat

Cold cuts like ham and bologna, hot dogs, bacon, and sausage are all -- yet again -- jam-packed with salt and also various chemicals like sodium nitrates. Many of them also contain tons of preservatives and lots of fat. Specifically, hot dogs and sausage can contain up to 23 grams of fat. Consider fresh meats, like skinless poultry and roast beef instead.

6) French Fries

We all know it's hard to just eat a couple of French fries, especially when we need that salty fix. That salt in those fried potato sticks is precisely what keeps us hooked, and always wanting more. One study reveals that sodium intake creates sensitivity to dopamine, a neurotransmitter that helps control the brain's pleasure centers. There is actually a connection between salt and addiction-related pathways in the brain. In fact, the same gene group that regulates your appetite for salt also regulates cocaine and heroin addictions.

7) Ice Cream

Also full of fat, calories, sugar, and often the addictive high-fructose corn syrup, ice cream can be difficult to portion. Realistically, we're not going to eat a half-cup of ice cream, which is the typical serving size for grocery store ice cream brands, like Ben & Jerry's and Haagen-Dazs. For example, a half-cup of Haagen-Dazs White Chocolate Raspberry Truffle has 18 grams of fat, 310 calories, and 28 grams of sugar. Most people will eat at least one cup of ice cream at a time, doubling all of those numbers. Instead, go for Greek yogurt and fruit, or frozen grapes, or frozen bananas. And if you must have the ice cream, consider the lower-fat and lower-calorie ice cream at the store.

The foods on this list are calorie-dense, lack nutritional value, and can be addictive. While most of us indulge in these foods every once in a while, if you find yourself constantly craving these addictive foods, consider writing down the situations when you start craving them. Where are you? What do you see? Do you smell something? What time is it? Becoming more aware of why you get cravings can help you make very positive changes to your eating habits

What do you think is the most addictive unhealthy food?

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For Six Days, I Almost Had HIV

As a woman with an (un)healthy suspicion of all men, I get tested for STDs pretty regularly. Last fall, what started as girl talk and gossip on a Saturday after brunch gradually evolved into a discussion about acidic fear of STDs. My brunch companion suddenly announced an urgent need to get checked, and I -- confident about my health -- was more than willing to schedule an appointment alongside her. Since health care eluded me last fall, I kept my free clinic appointment even when my friend canceled hers.



They played The Goonies in the waiting room of Planned Parenthood. I silently chuckled to myself as I realized that every eye would rather watch the screen than catch another. Every other seat was filled with 20-somethings, their eyes following the boobie traps that sideswiped the boys on TV and almost sank them to their doom.



In the exam room, I smiled at the nurse in gentle pink and white scrubs, my hands folded patiently. A cheek swab was taken for a rapid oral HIV test, my cells off to represent me. I had waited longer in the exam room than the room meant for waiting by the time the nurse came back.



I assumed she'd bring news that would have me out the door and back to Berkeley in no time. Then again, I'm an optimist. A cynical optimist, but an optimist all the same.



"So I have the preliminary results of your rapid test and they came back positive... "



"What?"



Panic. Storm. Nightmare fog. Gray and icy shards of memory of every condom I'd ever used.



"What?" I asked again.



All I heard was "positive," "not conclusive," "send blood to the lab," "HIV positive.



You're a ghost of yourself when things that happen to other people suddenly happen to you.



"I know you said you're pretty safe..."



I scoffed. I'd have told her I was always safe if not for the current state of things.



"... but you said there was one person you thought might be suspect, what makes you think that?"



"Because he's a dirty punk!"



There I was, yelling at the nurse at Planned Parenthood about dirty punk kids.



"I'm sorry," I told her through tears in a contorted apology. "You're being really nice, I just... don't know what to do."



My blood was drawn, tainted blood, and sent off to a lab for a conclusive answer. The future of my stability had been shipped and packaged like rations to a vampiric deity.



My test had come back with what they call a "preliminary positive." Rapid oral tests produce false positives something like two -- up to four in some reports -- out of a thousand times.



"Two out of a thousand" was not the calming mantra the nurse intended it to be. It only fueled my steaming fear and helpless desire to punch that kind, kind woman in her happy, fleshy, HIV-negative face.



I could barely bring myself to type in "HIV positive" into the Google search engine once I got home. Having to search for help in a real-life situation rather than in a hypothetical one made the severity of my possible condition feel achingly real.



I wondered if this diagnosis would be the end of my already short run with romance. I looked up stories about couples with at least one partner living with HIV-happy couples, people who weren't denying the struggle but making the struggle seem livable. I wondered what I would tell people. How would I explain? Once I'd cleared the pages upon pages of sites with alarmingly scary statistics, the electric terror began to subside. What was left inside my hollow being was a pinpoint of light and a voice that said, This is how I'll know who my real friends are. And that didn't seem so bad. This was cynical optimism at its finest: expecting a dark fate and making the best of it



The next Sunday I called Planned Parenthood. I had an appointment for the following day, but I couldn't wait -- I needed to talk to someone now. I hadn't told anyone but my best friend about the preliminary test, and I couldn't sew composure on my face any longer. I gave my name and my files were searched. The woman on the phone was answering too brightly for my shadowy disposition.



"Oh! Looks like your lab results came back..."



Every atom ceased to stir.



"... negative.



The cogs began to spin again, and warm breath blew out of a body that had laid still for six days. I asked the woman on the phone to repeat herself twice.



Six days. For six days, I almost had HIV. Nothing was more scary, nothing shook me more than that limbo state. True, I was never really at high risk of contraction, but rational reasoning goes out the door when you're told preliminarily that your entire timeline could be skewed so far off the map that there's no recognition of the future you'd imagined.



For a while I was angry that so many false positives were allowed to exist. But the rapid testing does provide something valuable: hurried relief. Or a hurried answer to a burning question that allows for immediate action to be taken.



I'm more frustrated about the way we talk about sex -- and its consequences. We live in a media-driven world where sex sells, and though we're theoretically more comfortable now than ever before when discussing free love and sexuality, it's still uncool and taboo to talk about the fact that over 1.1 million people in the U.S. alone have HIV. On top of that, one in six people don't even know they have it. And with approximately one in four new infections occurring in people under the age of 24, why take chances and try to YOLO your way out of being safe? People generally don't love the traditional condom, but new condoms like this and this are being tested, and they could revolutionize the way we think about, talk about and have safe sex.



This is not a happy story, despite my ultimately happy ending. It's just real talk from someone who's fed up with hiding under the covers to avoid grown-up conversations about the birds and the bees. It's time to talk about the real monsters hiding under the bed.



This story first appeared on Ravishly.com



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A Snake Oil Salesman Alive and Well in Dr. Oz

I was born a skeptic, and that is to my advantage. I don't buy products based on someone's glowing claims of success. Even as a woman who has always been looking to "lose a few pounds," I never bought into the absurdness of miracle diets or gurus. There are none. No pills, no magic beans, no quick fixes. So you can imagine my disappointment in a man, a medical doctor, who pushes "miracle" products to his viewers.



When his show first came on the air, I used to watch Dr. Mehmet Oz for his decent factual health tips. He is, after all, a personable man with a charming way of winning over his audience, and his medical knowledge was on target. But I quickly became disillusioned with him because of my skepticism.

When he began touting "miracle diets," I began to see him very differently: a charming, well-spoken modern day snake oil salesman who shills for fake products.



Because of the high rates of true obesity in our country, it has become popular to hawk the latest diets and diet products, and Dr. Oz has happily jumped on the bandwagon in doling out "professional advice" to his legions of fans, the majority of whom are women. The fact that the camera pans closely on his audience of adoring, screaming women whenever he utters a prophetic sentence is no accident. The PR doctrine here is crystal clear: Look at how wonderful this man is! Look at how he understands us! Come on women, this man is a god!



Most people were brought up to believe that doctors, most especially male doctors, are gods. Health and remedies, life and death were in the hands of your doctor. So when Mehmet Oz tells you that raspberry ketones, green coffee extract, and garcinia camboja are miracle weight loss fixes, his audience eats it up. Hey, he's a doctor, why would he mislead us?



Why? For the same reason the snake oil salesman of old mislead his audience: some type of profit.



In Dr. Oz's case, the profit may not be monetary (no evidence has yet been found that he has gained financially for his shill). His profit is one that adds to his celebrity status. In other words, Mehmet Oz is more media star than medical doctor, and it has gone to his head. In his own words, he has said:

My job, I feel, on the show is to be a cheerleader for the audience, and when they don't think they have hope, when they don't think they can make it happen, I want to look, and I do look everywhere, including in alternative healing traditions, for any evidence that might be supportive to them.

The weight loss industry is notorious for false advertising and fake claims and Dr. Oz, boyishly appealing with an M.D., is their perfect salesman. His endorsements of raspberry ketones, the bean from green coffee extract, and garcinia camboja sound way too much like professionally scripted infomercials. Witness his energetic statement concerning green coffee extract.

You may think magic is make-believe, but this little bean has scientists saying they found the magic weight-loss for every body type.

Needless to say sales of this "little bean" jumped due to the doc's persuasive flowery language, a way of speaking to his audience that he hotly defends.



Oz has argued that he has to be "passionate" to engage his viewers and, that while he recognizes his claims (for the products) may not have the scientific muster to pass as fact, when he can't use "language that is flowery, that is exulting, I feel like I've been disenfranchised." He feels disenfranchised? Wow! What about his audience? They are being duped by someone they deemed not only knowledgeable but trustworthy.



We have too many celebrities with pseudo-medical knowledge more than willing to dupe the public and shill sometimes harmful products. One only has to look at Suzanne Somers and her "medical knowledge" of potentially dangerous and expensive bio-identical hormones.



As for someone with Dr. Oz's medical knowledge and expertise, we expect, and should demand, truth and not hype.



© 2014 copyright Kristen Houghton



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